June 2012
34 posts
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An Open Letter to my Facebook Followers:
I know a lot of my FB peeps have issues and hobbies they feel strongly about. I appreciate your dedication to your causes, but it’s becoming problematic when all my updates are nothing but your frequent attempts to change my views or non-participation of the particular activities you want me involved in. Don’t overwhelm people by driving your ideals to the point where they might tune...
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Grandma Watches LMFAO For the First Time
LMFAO was on Good Morning America.
Grandma: "What is this band and why is there a box there?"
Me: "They're called LMFAO, and the box is the Party Rock robot."
Grandma: "Why is there a dancing zebra?"
Me: "Its just a fun little thing they have at concerts."
*fast forward to the end*
Grandma: "I see the box, where's the dancing zebra???"
I love my grandma!
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Bus driving is dangerous!!!
Me: "Yeah, my dad was in the Army but he insists all he did was drive school children in Italy to school."
Him: "Through a heard of goats on fire being catapulted in his direction???"
Me: "HAHAHAHHAHA, sure! That sounds more exciting!"
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A Breakup Letter
I grew up with you but now I don’t trust you. You infected me over and over again. You’re so slow and have the worst reputation. You kept saying you’d get better but you’ve always managed to stay the same. Sometimes I accidentally pull up your name and I wonder why I kept you. I found bigger and better and I’m so much happier now! I’m deleting you. Goodbye,...
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